We always hear the question, “Who can find a virtuous woman?” from Proverbs 31:10.  However, as young ladies and women that question does nothing for us.  The questions we should be asking are “Who can become a virtuous woman?” and “How do I become a virtuous woman?”

So, to look at the first question, “Who can become a virtuous woman?” we must realize that anyone of us can.  We just have to follow the example that she left. 

To begin with, “The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he should have no need of spoil.  She will do him good all the days of her life.” (Proverbs 31:11-12). 

So basically the virtuous woman is trustworthy.  Her husband can trust her to be there for him, to give him honest counsel, and respect his final decisions.  So what do we have to do to become that?

1. Be dependable.  1 Jn 2:5-6 “But whoso keepeth his word, in him verily is the love of God perfected: hereby know we that are in him”.
   1. Part of being trustworthy is being dependable, and following through on your word.  The heart of a man cannot trust in a woman who is not committed to keeping her vows, and always being there
2. Be honest.  Phil 4:8 “Finally brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest…if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things”.
   1. We cannot be trust worthy if we are not honest.  Therefore, we have to DECIDE that we are going to be honest, and always tell the truth, because through telling the truth we build people’s trust in us.  How could a husband put his trust in a woman who is not honest with him?  Part of our responsibility as a help-meet for a husband is to provide him with honest counsel.
3. Be submissive.  Eph 5:22 “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.”
   1. In the end the responsibility for the decisions for the house falls to the husband. In fact, it is part of the curse God gave to Adam.  Genesis 3:16 God told Eve “…thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.”  So to be a virtuous woman, we have to let our husbands rule over us and be the heads of our households.

Okay, So that looks at the first two verses, I will do some more later, but right now I want to make the point that if even if you do not have a husband, you can work towards becoming this virtuous woman. 

How you may ask?

1. Be dependable in your life now.  One day a gentleman will come along and see that you are dependable, that you keep your word, and he will respect that.
2. Be honest in your life now.  Keep all of your conversations honest, that way the reputation you have is that of an honest young lady, and then that young gentleman will respect that too.
3. Show a submissive attitude.  Now, this does not mean laying down and being a doormat, you can stand up for yourself and what is right, but respect authority.  For example, obeying your parents, the leaders of the church, and the commandments of God, because if a gentleman sees that you can be submissive to those authority figures, he can reason that you would respect his authority and allow him to fulfill his God-given responsibility. 

These are just a few pieces of thought on the process of becoming a virtuous woman; I am hoping that next week I can look into the next few verses.  Remember Heb 13:8 “Jesus Christ the same yesterday, and today, and forever.”

When people think of your name what comes to their mind?  I often try to answer this question for myself, because I am genuinely concerned about what people think when they hear my name. 

I am not worried because I need their approval, but because I want to be someone whose name brings good thoughts. That encourages them in their walk with Christ.

In the book of Proverbs Solomon says "A good name is rather to be chosen than great riches, and loving favour rather than silver and gold."(Pr 22:1).

So how do we obtain a good name? Here's some of what I think:

• Watch who you surround yourself with, "Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners" (1Co 15:33).  Yes, we can can influence non-believers for good, but if they are the only ones we are with, then they will probably end up bringing us down. 

• Consider what you might think if you saw someone going into the places you are going into.  If you saw someone you went to church with going into a club, you probably will start thinking less of them.  So, if you were to to go into a club even, if you never drank a drink -- you were purely there to dance-- what might that do to somone's opinion of who you are. 

• Remember that the things you do not only reflect on you, but on every organization and person you may be associated with.  That's a huge responsibility.  When my dad would be dropping me off at school for extracirruclar events (basketball tournaments/band competitions) he would always say "Kaley, you need to remember that you are representing more than just yourself at this event today.  You are representing your school, our city as a whole, the organization you are preticipating with, our family and our church, so make sure you act right." 
  
   

These are just some of the things that I think of when I am trying to analyze the name I have, or my opinion of someone else.

Remember, in the Bible, it is clear that we are to desire a good reputation or name; "A good name is better than precious ointment; and the day of death than the day of one's birth" (Ec 7:1). :)

So, have you ever had that week in which you think nothing else bad could possibly happen? That everything bad happened to you? 

I have...and after I have those thoughts, I often think about how hard I try to be a good person, and how unfair that bad things happen to me...a good person...a christian. 

However I am often pulled out of these dangerous thoughts-for they are dangerous because they are self-pitying ,self-centered thoughts-by:

Matthew 5:45 "That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust." This verse, basically reminds me, that though I am a Christian that bad things can still happen to me because it is GOD'S will.  However, there will also be good things! 

Then I think about what things are "bad" to me, and compare them to the challenges to others. What about the Christians in India and Nigeria that face persecution for their beliefs? Nothing in my life is as challenging as having to risk my life for my beliefs.

I conclude these thoughts by remembering a song we often sing at church "Count Your Blessings." The chorus of that song says "Count your many blessings, name them one by one, and it will surprise you what the Lord hath done!"

God has done so much for us, we never need to lose sight of that. Oh, and remember he is always with you even if it seems your life is having just rain!

Matthew 8:28 "...lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen."